Couples Therapy

The joy of companionship is everlasting for some couples.

While walking through the park, you notice an elderly couple.

They’re trundling along, holding hands.

While you can’t hear what they’re saying, you can see their communication. Loud and clear.

You see them turn to gaze at one another. The couple shares a laugh, and the older man’s gaze lingers on her.

The image of their affection causes reflection.

A thought enters your mind – you can’t remember the last time your husband looked at you with a lingering gaze.

You can’t even remember the last time you looked at him and felt anything like the joy that couple shares. You don’t even smile at each other anymore.

What you’d give to share such warmth and companionship – it would be wonderful to have such glowing love blossoming between you.

Was there ever a time you walked along hand in hand and shared a laugh?

What happened to the relationship?

Now, the two of you are distant.

Rather than growing together like the old couple, you have grown apart.

You wonder, “When did he become so aloof? When did our marriage begin to feel like a business arrangement?”

How did the two of you become so distant, shut down, mechanical, and cold?

You vowed ‘til death do you part, but…

You never thought you’d end up in a loveless, icy marriage.

When you were first together, you both used to talk about growing old together, happily in love.

You were both so sure that the spark would never fade between you.

But things got complicated.

Somehow, everything else just seemed to come first, to sap all the energy between you – the kids, bills, chores, jobs, and everything else.

You spent more and more time with your friends and doing your hobbies, and so did he.

Now, you pass one another in the hallway, not saying much and becoming so distant.

How did it get so cold between you? It’s hard to say.

Maintaining closeness requires work.

You know that neither of you has made any effort to keep the fire alive.

It occurs to you that both of you are longing for something more.

You know that you don’t want to settle for a cold, loveless marriage in your heart. Your partner doesn’t either.

You wonder if it’s too late. Perhaps the frost has killed your blooming relationship.

There is no fire.

Lighting the fire again requires help.

It’s clear to you that both of you cannot get the spark again on your own.

Where would you even start? You’re going to need some help. You’ll bet he’d be willing to get some help, too, if you can muster the courage to suggest it.

Still, you wonder…

Is there’s anyone who can understand our problems? Is there anyone who can help us?

You wonder if a marriage like yours can recover after so long a frost.

At the same time, being like that old couple is a beautiful thought.

It would be nice to see that long gaze again.

I’ve helped many couples find their spark, get the warmth back.

There’s good reason to hope; the best is yet to come, so take courage.

Call me now for a free consultation (805) 712-1646.

Let’s talk about how your marriage can blossom into the passionate love that you both genuinely long to have.